Spoilers and Movies
by A. Zap
Summary: It's family movie night, but it can be tough picking out a movie that's okay for everyone. Luckily, Stan has a plan though it may come a bit at Ford's expense. One shot. Star Wars mention. Stanuary Week 4 Prompt: Family.


**Disclaimer: I do not own Gravity Falls or its characters. Otherwise the events of this fic are exactly the kind of torture I'd put them through.**

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Spoilers and Movies

It could be quite a challenge to pick out a movie for the Pines family, especially for movie night.

Stan paused as he raked his eyes over his collection of VHS's and Soos's DVD's. The thing was that they all had so many issues that some movies simply had to be cut out.

Ford couldn't watch anything that had a portal in it. He seemed pretty okay with it, but they all had noticed the way he'd tense up at the sight of one in a movie, especially if it had a blue glow. They all had to be cautious with sci-fi horror movies, because the first few they had watched together had ended with stories from Ford's time on the other side of the portal that made the rest of the family want to toss their cookies. It wasn't so bad when it turned out that he had met things that looked similar but were actually peaceful compared to what was on screen, but the other times…

Needless to say, Stan, Mabel, and Dipper had no desire to watch _Stomach-busting Parasites_ any time soon.

For Soos, Stan, Mabel, and Dipper, Claymation movies were completely off the table after what they'd gone through. Other stop motion movies depended on what it looked like.

Stan had a hard time watching movies, usually dramas, with homeless characters or ones who had people thrown out of their families, especially if there was guaranteed to be no happy ending. He'd thought he'd kept his dislike under wraps for the few occasions he'd seen Dipper and Mabel watching them, usually on TV or from stuff from the library, but he had noticed after Ford came back that they no longer watched them.

After Weirdmaggedon, some of the more psychedelic or hardcore horror movies were out of the picture.

That didn't mean that there weren't many movies they could watch, but it was still difficult to find something they'd all like.

"Stanley, just choose something." Ford groused from where he was setting things up around the armchair.

Stan rolled his eyes. _Jeez, some people just can't appreciate what you do for them._ He sighed and frowned at the movies before him. He traced a finger along them, halfway ready to just do eeney-meeney-miney-moe to pick one. His finger stopped on one.

A mischievous smile spread across his face.

He had a wonderful idea. It was also pretty horrible. It was a terrible, wonderful, horrible idea.

He suppressed his chuckles, otherwise Ford would know something was up. "Hey," he said nonchalantly, "you liked the _Star Wars_ movies, right?"

Ford's head popped up, a grin quickly stretching across it. "Yes! Of course!" Mabel and Dipper walked into the room with the snacks and gave Stan a suspicious look, sensing that he was plotting. "The two movies are perhaps some of my favorites!"

"Oh yeah, you never got to see the third of the originals, didn't you?" Stan knew that he hadn't gotten to see the third one. Ford fell through the portal an entire year before it came out.

But, he could use that to his advantage.

He could see from Dipper and Mabel's faces that they had caught on to his plan, but from Dipper's eye roll and Mabel's thumbs up, it was clear that they approved.

"A third?" Ford's eyes lit up. "Do we have it?"

"Yep." Stan turned to him, holding up the VHS. "Wanna watch this?"

"Of course, of course." Ford was bouncing a bit. "I never would have imagined you would be interested in them."

"Eh. They reminded me of you." Stan shrugged, as he set up the VCR. "Besides, if you buy one ticket and you're sneaky enough, you can get away with staying in a theater for an entire day and night at least."

Ford gave a small grimace at that. Personally, as painful as such memories tended to be, Stan was grateful to have them after the whole amnesia thing. He still had some episodes every now and then, so he really didn't mind when he did remember them.

Heh, mind.

"We were raised on these!" Mabel quickly said to change the subject.

"Yeah, these were always a lot better than the prequels." Dipper said to back her up.

"Really?" A sly grin sprung up on Mabel's face. "I remember a certain someone watching _Phantom Menace_ over and over again."

"Prequels?" Ford looked between the three of them, interest crossing his face.

The other three exchanged a glance. _Abort! Abort!_

"Soos! Get in here! I'm putting the movie in!" Stan yelled, sliding the VHS in.

"Gotcha, Mr. Pines." Soos walked in, carrying the tray of drinks. He passed them out as they all settled in.

"Hey, Ford," Stan said as he settled back in his chair and a boring interview with George Lucas showed on the screen as they waited for the movie to start, "did you support any of the romantic subplots in these movies?"

"Oh, yes. I hope to see that they finally get together." Ford still looked excited, though the others looked at each other. Soos, Mabel, and Dipper clearly had no clue who Ford would support, but Stan had his suspicions.

Oh, this was going to fun.

Finally, the opening title scrolled up the screen. All of them were quickly sucked into the movie. It truly was one of the classics.

Stan heard Ford snort at Leia and Han's interactions, and he just knew his instincts were correct. He couldn't wait for the reveal.

And it wasn't too long before it happened.

All of them ignored the tear that Ford subtly wiped away at Yoda's death. They could at least give him that before the bomb dropped.

" _This is the reason why your sister remains safely anonymous."_

" _Leia! Leia's my sister!"_

"What?" Ford's eyes widened. "What? Stop the movie!"

Stan hit the stop button. He looked over and this was the exact reaction he'd been expecting.

"Luke…and…Leia…." Ford's words were tripping over themselves, and he was clearly in shock. "They're…"

"TWINS!" Mabel shouted jumping up and down.

"But they… But I…" The blood drained from his face and he whirled to face Stan. "You didn't throw away any of my papers over the years, right?"

"No, I didn't. Soos said that he shoved them into the desk in your old room. Why do you – " Stan cut himself out off as Ford suddenly dashed off, nearly knocking over the snacks in his haste.

"I've got some things I need to burn!" He shouted over his shoulder. "Don't start the movie back up until I return!"

They managed to hold out for a whole minute before they all burst into laughter.

"Oh my god!" Dipper wiped tears from his eyes he was laughing so hard. "That was… that was…"

"Great!" Mabel finished for him, trying to control her giggles. "We should do stuff like this more often."

"Yes, surprising people with the twists and turns of a story can be great." Soos sighed, before confusion crossed his brow. "Wait, what is he burning?"

"Fan fiction." Stan snickered. His brother had done it with other things they had liked when they were kids, so Stan had figured that he had done it as he got older as well.

"Fan fiction?" Soos's eyes lit up with sparkles. "Do you think he'd read my fan fiction?"

"Eh. Why not?" Stan shrugged.

"So he – " Dipper managed to get out as his laughter tapered off.

"Well, he certainly didn't ship the Han and Leia part of the triangle." Stan confirmed, using the modern word Mabel had taught him to her apparent delight.

An explosion sounded off from the other side of the house, but they all ignored it. When Ford was home, it was a regular occurrence.

The younger twins had finally gotten a hold of themselves, and so they all decided to wait patiently for Ford's return until a thought occurred to Stan.

"Oh, man," he muttered, mostly to himself, "he is gonna hate the Ewoks."

The other three people in the room turned to look at him, bewildered.

"Why would he hate the Ewoks?" Mabel asked, almost in horror.

"They are cuddly and fuzzy and probably give great hugs!" Soos followed up, nodding. "Why would anyone hate them?"

"Wait, people hate the Ewoks?" Dipper joined in.

Stan chuckled. _Oh, these poor, sweet kids._ "There is actually a lot of hatred towards the Ewoks." He said, and he tactfully ignored their alarmed gasps. "Though it's mostly from people who are over 30 when they first see this movie."

The others exchanged worried glances as Ford reentered. He still looked a little flustered, but things seemed to be okay now. "Alright," he said, clearing his throat, "you can restart the movie."

The film played on and luckily, they all seemed to enjoy it. Stan did note that Ford's brow wrinkled whenever the Ewoks were on screen, but they got through it.

It really was a great movie to end a wonderful trilogy. Plus, it was even more enjoyable to see Ford clearly lying about liking the Ewoks to Mabel.

Still, that could all slide in the name of family movie night.

And then disaster struck.

"You said that there were prequels as well." Ford quickly changed the topic from the Ewoks as he slid his glasses up his nose. "Maybe we could start watching those tomorrow night?" He sounded so hopeful that Stan almost felt bad about telling him about the train wreck that was the prequels.

Then he looked at Dipper and Mabel, and at the same time, they all got the same evil smiles on their faces.

 _If we had to suffer, then he should too._

"Okay, sure." Stan told his brother with a much more friendlier smile.

Soos frowned. "But Mr. Pines – " Dipper and Mabel quickly shut him up by placing their hands over his mouth.

"I can't wait!" Ford said with an excited smile as he picked up some of the remains of their snacking and walked towards the kitchen.

As he left, the remaining Pines couldn't help but chuckled. Ford was totally going to hate them for what they were about to do.

But then again, what was family for?

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 _AN: So I debated whether or not to call_ Star Wars _something different here (the biggest contenders being_ Galaxy Fights _and_ Planet Conflicts _or something in that vein. However, I ultimately decided that Star Wars is a multiversal phenomenon where it exists as it is here in every universe but the ones that are actually the Star Wars 'verse and the universes where the prequels are actually good._

 _I decided to do the Stanuary Family prompt about this because Star Wars is a big thing in my family. It is one of the few things that everyone is into and likes. My sibs and I were raised on it. Heck, my younger sibs did the whole "Let's watch_ Phantom Menace _a billion times over and over." My sister and I did not enjoy that particular film that much. Also, I'm basing Stan's VHS's on the ones my family has for the original trilogy (which came out in the early '90's before the special editions so it doesn't have any unnecessary and unwanted CGI stuff popping up and has parts of an exclusive interview with George Lucas at the beginning we always fast-forwarded through. I didn't see any of the special editions until last fall and yeah, not impressed)._

 _So I hope you all have had a good Stanuary. I still have two parts of Building the Gap to finish up and post but I think that's the only other Stan content I have for now._


End file.
